Just when Tomtastic thought he'd never sit in a barbers chair again, Mohawk Matt came to his rescue. Bolt Barbers is a true piofuckineer of the Los Angeles barbershop scene offering "dudes aged 7 to 70 close shaves, attention grabbing beards, crispy tapers, tight fades, slick pomps, hawks, high & tights and flat tops." If you live anywhere near LA, stop in to Bolt for your next shear, shave and shine, and ask for the monkeytail special to release the social beast from within- you'll be glad you did.
Thursday, June 30, 2011
Wednesday, June 29, 2011
Daniel and Tchetchelo. These guys look freaking huge. We won't make any smart-ass comments, but we will happily roll with these guys if we ever decide to spend time on the Jersey Shore rocking our monkey tail beards.
Tuesday, June 28, 2011
Monday, June 27, 2011
We want you and that face so fucking bad we lose sleep at night. TomTastic has been waking up in a cold sweat dreaming of the moment his razor gently comes into contact with your face. You know we were meant to be together. Through your living room window, we see how sad you are, partying with 23 yr old groupies sipping Cristal from solid gold goblets in front of your 100 inch LED TV as you wade in your Olympic-sized living room pool (which we admit, we had never heard of before). That big smile doesn't hide the tears. You can't let everything go to voice-mail, Brian! You know you want to pick up that call. We know you want to pick up that call. Do it, Brian! Do it!
Love Forever and Always (as long as you wear that beard),
Friday, June 24, 2011
Mike from Seattle is larger than life. Regardless of his
freakish handicap, he holds his chin up high and rocks his monkeytail proudly. No longer do people stare at his huge hands in horror, and run in the other direction. So brave, Mike, so brave. Welcome to to our sick family :^9
Wednesday, June 22, 2011
Tuesday, June 21, 2011
Once again, a group of rockstars have put their family names in jeopardy and CRUSHED the current record of 5 Monkeytails. Contrary to public opinion all of these men display at least average intelligence. More info here.
Monday, June 20, 2011
Although he doesn't look like a threat, Lucas started a rally of 1 in our nation's capital in support of the Monkeytail Revolution. Sadly he was hit in the jugular by a tranq dart and detained by Homeland Security just minutes after this photo was taken. Where do we think he is now?
Tuesday, June 14, 2011
Monday, June 13, 2011
Friday, June 10, 2011
Thursday, June 9, 2011
Wednesday, June 8, 2011
Tuesday, June 7, 2011
Monday, June 6, 2011
Friday, June 3, 2011
The Texas 5 emailed us a new world record. Just like that, they enter the annals of history. Albeit a very small, detested area of history. This is from a corporate fundraiser and we were informed that 2 of the guys got laid and none of the guys lost their jobs. And 1 of the "2" guys actually got a bonus. We're are guessing it is Ringtail guy in blue.
Thursday, June 2, 2011
From our reporter in the field:
"My name is BJ. I was in Durango, CO this weekend drinking some beers at the brewery. I was sporting the monkeytail. We asked a former stranger to take a picture of the group of us. Someone she was with asked, "Is that a Monkey Tail beard?" Apparently he had heard of it in theory but thought it was kind of like a unicorn, that he'd never actually see one. Turns out, he got to see one after all. We wondered if the Monkey Tail belonged in the fashion show that we were watching...it probably did, what do you think?"